Pulgasari

zLet's get out of Japan for the first time in a long time! We're talking about Pulgasari, a North Korean kaiju film from 1984. That might strike you as strange, but let's continue. The background on this film is... a lot. The director, Shin Sang-ok, was a famous and popular director from South Korea who was kidnapped by North Korean agents in the 70's in an attempt to elevate North Korean cinema. Pulgasari was the last of these films made by Shin, and a remake of a lost film from the 60's based on the same legend. There's not space enough here to talk about the kidnapping saga, but needless to say the making of this film is predicated on some absolutely buck-wild events.

The wackiness of the background of this film doesn't end there, however, as the main actor of Pulgasari, the titular character? Kenpachiro Satsuma, a veteran of Godzilla movies and the suit actor for Godzilla himself in the upcoming Heisei era of Godzilla films. In fact, the first of the Heisei Godzilla movies came out before Pulgasari, so Satsumsa went from being cast as Godzilla, to making a North Korean kaiju film with a director who was kidnapped by the state, to playing Godzilla in subsequent films. That's not as wild as literally being nabbed by a country to elevate their country's cinema, but it is a strange turn of events all its own that seemed worth mentioning.

If You Haven't Seen it Before

- In a small village ruled by a horrible tyrant, a local blacksmith tries to keep the army from taking his village's farming and cooking tools, without which they'll be unable to live (literally). He is imprisoned. 

- Before he dies of starvation, he creates a figure and prays to the gods that they will make the figure a living creature that protects people and saves humanity.

- The adorable Pulgasari predictably comes to life and begins to eat all things metal his tiny self can get ahold of.

- As the tyrants soldiers come by to further torment the villagers, the ever-growing Pulgasari begins to eat their weapons and bite their faces, finally beginning a proper resistance. Pulgasari is now human-sized, having begun his life just a few days before while fitting in the palm of a hand.

- The newly inspired rebels, supported by Pulgasari, invade the local tyrants' palace and kill him.

- The king, of whom the corrupt and terribly tyrant was but a representative, must crush this new rebellion. Unfortunately for him, Pulgasari keeps growing stronger and bigger as they bring weapons for him to eat.

- The king does manage to capture and execute the leader of the rebellion, and threatens to kill the blacksmith's daughter (with whom Pulgasari has a bond) if Pulgasari does not surrender himself.

- Sacrificing himself for his greatest friend, Pulgasari subjects itself to fire and explosives as the king's men try to kill him. This fails and they reap some heavy consequences by dying in a brutal fashion.

- The evil army apparently, finally, manages to kill Pulgasari by setting a trap and burying him alive. The evil army begins to win this war, executing the leader of the rebellion and having already captured the blacksmith's daughter.

- The blacksmith's daughter escapes and is out for vengeance! She revives Pulgasari using her blood and he returns to finally finish off the evil king.

- After smiting the king, Pulgasari is regarded as a hero by his people and they allow him to eat their weapons (as they no longer need them).

- Insatiable, Pulgasari continues eating, eventually progressing to their cooking and farming tools just like the original tyrant that started this all. 

- The blacksmith's daughter, Pulgasari's best friend, realizes he cannot control himself and will lead to the death of them all when he eats all of their metal tools.

- She hides herself in a giant metal bell, ringing it to draw the attention of Pulgasari. As he prepares to eat the bell with her inside, she prays that he will leave this earth with her.

- Having eaten the person who gave him life, Pulgasari turns to stone before shattering.

Kaiju Notes

- Both baby and teen Pulgasari are adorable. Resembling an armadillo mixed with a bipedal lizard, he is almost a perfect union of the cute/scary scale while he's maturing.

- As Pulgasari grows, he gains horns to complement his appearance. Some might claim that looks like a demon, and they'd be right, but at least he looks like a (relatively) friendly one.

- Pulgasari's motivation, eating metal, is strange. He wouldn't make much of a kaiju in the Godzilla-verse since he lacks lasers or explosive weaponry, but in the context of helping people rebel against tyrants it's a very good fit. Though this story takes place many centuries ago, I bet a metal eating monster which appears invulnerable to most harm would fuck up some tanks and battleships too, if he wanted.

- Pulgasari does seem to be able to absorb heat and use it as a weapon, so that might actually be really useful if he were up against Godzilla. Radiation is a type of heat, right? In this movie though he uses it in one dramatic scene to absolutely fuck up some soldiers. After being set on fire and being hot, he goes to cool off in the sea. The soldiers trying to escape from him via boat are capsized and thrown in the water, and the water begins to boil as Pulgasari cools off. Holy shit.

- Satsuma brings his veteran suit acting ability to Pulgasari, making the little and big versions seem like a loyal pet to the blacksmith's daughter, who simply can't be killed and loves eating metal.

Pulgasari is not going to be gaining any points for excellent special effects or story telling. It does, however, do an effective job at telling the story it is going for. Pulgasari himself manages to look more menacing than he behaves (unless you're his enemy), which is fitting for his ultimate characterization of a relatively simple beast with an interest in helping his friends and eating metal. This simpleness contributes to his downfall, however, as he takes all the villagers metal not out of malice but out of his own desires. The human performances are broad, but Satsuma's work as Pulgasari is particularly interesting. 

As mentioned a few sentences before, Pulgasari seems more "simple-minded animal" than anything else. Even at his most menacing it often seems accidental, as in the above mentioned scene where he boils soldiers in the sea. Pulgasari himself didn't seem to have it as a plan, simply killing all of these people as a consequence of trying to cool himself down. It's brutal in effect, but seemingly innocent in intent, and it creates an interesting dynamic between Pulgasari's effect and his affect. While obviously Satsuma did not (likely) make these decisions by himself and it was likely in the script, it colors everything Pulgasari does and makes the creature himself enjoyable to watch. Even his death is a bit unclear, in that his (accidental) eating of the blacksmith's daughter either makes him choose to die or happens as a consequence of him killing the one who gave him life. Either way, the circumstances only happen because the blacksmith's daughter understands that he'll simply eat metal when he sees it, so it contributes to an interpretation of him as simple rather than malicious, or even particularly intentional in his actions.

Some have suggested that Pulgasari's arc is a critique of North Korean leadership, being a revolutionary figure who saves the people before turning to being their oppressor in a similar vein of the previous despot. While I can understand that take on a "this is what happens on paper" level, it doesn't read to me as true based on the actual film. While it's all technically true, Pulgasari's characterization (see the paragraphs above) makes it seem more accidental than intentional despotism, which is not applicable to the government of North Korea. Each choice they make is intentional and has a reason behind it far beyond Pulgasari's simple desires, so I think applying that interpretation to the movie would actually weaken it as critique of the government who kidnapped the director. Pulgasari has more in common with Daiei's Daimajin, both centered on heroic (and violent) creatures which must be brought down by the same people they helped. Adding to this that the plot is apparently based on a Korean legend, Pulgasari seems a more straight-forward kaiju film rather than a thinly-veiled takedown of Kim Jong-il.

At the end of the day, Pulgasari is more interesting than it is entertaining. It's not necessarily bad in any way, but there's nothing about it that makes a strong initial impression. In the context of kaiju movies it is very similar to Daimajin, though substituting "hunger" for "wrath" as the titular character's motivation. Pulgasari himself is a bit of a delight as a character, being somehow vacant and self-directed at the same time and charming yet menacing. It's hard to suggest one watches this for themselves, but it's also not the worst film we've seen through this blog by any means. If you're really into kaiju movies (what a weirdo, who does that?), it's worth a look-see.

Next: The Return of Godzilla!

Terror of MechaGodzilla

Terror of MechaGodzilla marks a major turning point for the series of Godzilla movies: Ishirō Honda returns to the director chair after years away from the series. While Nakajima is away from the titular role, it's still a bit of a return of the pioneers because Honda is back after Nakajima's apparent retirement. The only person known to have played both Godzilla and Gamera, Toru Kawai plays Godzilla for this film, which is an interesting fact but nothing else. Rather than talk about the background of the movie, let's get to the details and see how this Terror of a movie holds up.

If You Haven't Seen it Before

- Searching for MechaGodzilla's head/remains, a group of scientists are attacked by the giant dinosaur Titanosaurus. The scientists disappear and a search begins.

- Realizing a mad scientist named Mafune has a connection to Titanosaurus, Interpol investigates and is told by his daughter Katsura that he is dead. This is a lie, and he conspires with the alien Simeons to rebuild MechaGodzilla (and take over the world).

- Lots of human plot happens next, with the only truly important bit being that Katsura is actually a cyborg, having nearly died from one of his experiments.

- Underwater, the humans manage to distress/harm Titanosaurus with supersonic waves while the Simeons watch on with great annoyance. Now they know Titanosaurus' weakness.

- Proving he doesn't take orders from aliens, Mafune unleashes the Titanosaurus unexpectedly.

- Godzilla vs Titanosaurus begins, finally giving the main character of the series something to do. Katsura gets shot in the neck and falls into a ravine, but she's part robot so I doubt she's dead yet.

- Katsura does get turned into... more of a robot? I'm unclear. But she's alive, and now controls the rebuilt MechaGodzilla.

- The three kaiju do battle, Godzilla having no backup this time. Godzilla is temporarily defeated by the combined forces of the two.

- Helping Godzilla, the human armed forces attach a supersonic antenna to Titanosaurus, which incapacitates him and allows Godzilla to recover. He's back, baby!

- As Godzilla tries (and mostly fails) to defeat MechaGodzilla, Katsura's new boyfriend convinces her to help him save the world. She shoots herself to destroy the MechaG controller inside her.

- MechaGodilla helpless, Organic Godzilla destroys it easily before turning his sights on the equally helpless Titanosaurus. He kills that too, ending the movie.

Kaiju Notes

- Titanosaurus is... uninspired. Of the two dinosaur kaiju, Gorosaurus is far superior if for no other reason than his beautiful blue back. On an aesthetic level there is little to say about Titanosaurus, it's a very boring creature. Even his abilities are underwhelming, and his weakness to supersonic weaponry means even the humans are able to do damage to him. All three kaiju together make an impressive sight, but it's mostly the two monsters with Godzilla in their names that makes it a sight worth seeing.

This movies marks the end of an era. This is the last film of the Showa period, as well as the last Godzilla movie ever directed by Ishiro Honda. With Haruo Nakajima retiring as Big G a few films ago, Godzilla (for better or for worse) will never be the same as the last twenty years of film. While I'm excited to see what the future of Godzilla holds (I have not yet seen any of the Heisei era films), I want to take time to respect the hell out of Honda and Nakajima's work, and all of their collaborators. Honda isn't even my favorite of the Showa-era directors, but the man must be given his due for the incredible work he put out. Sometimes ridiculous and sometimes unrelentingly somber, Honda had incredible range. Nakajima brought the one and only Godzilla, and the evolution of his portrayal from unstoppable rage monster to cocky, even arrogant hero was interesting to behold. He brought a certain improvisation to the part, making Godzilla seem simultaneously more real and more fake. With the Showa era behind us, I just wanted to take a moment to appreciate the originators.

Godzilla won zero fights in this movie. Without the help of the human (and occasional cyborg) characters, he would have been killed extremely easily. I'm not saying Godzilla has to be some unstoppable killing machine, but the King of the Monsters isn't very kingly here, mostly getting his ass kicked until other people step in and take down his foes for him. For the end of an era, it's a pretty major letdown. I'm not sure they were planning on this one being the end for a while, but it's an underwhelming conclusion to the era. To think it would be ten years before the return of the Big G and this is how it ended is both disappointing and expected. Why else would there be such long break between films?

This is a much more human focused movie than many kaiju films. Not only in regards of screentime but also influence. As said in the above paragraph, the humans do most of the real work here. Katsura's cyborg body is the closest thing to the central "monster" of the movie, even straddling the border between hero and villain and shifting as the movie continues. It's not terribly compelling, but it's the closest we get to the sympathetic kaiju of Mothra or King Kong. It's an oddly rushed story, especially the choice to give her the MechaGodzilla controller after her second go-round of robotic upgrades, when a more obvious choice would have been having it implanted at the early stages of the mad scientists collaboration with the Simeon aliens, but whatever. Regardless, Katsura makes a poor kaiju, but a better one than Titanosaurus, which tells you pretty much everything you need to know about Terror of MechaGodzilla.

Alas, there's not a whole lot to say about this one. It's not good, which is especially upsetting given how enjoyable the previous film was. It's too bad, but there isn't much to really comment on here. It's neither aggressively bad nor interesting, so it's really just... there. So, to the end of the Showa era of Godzilla movies we say: see ya later!

Next: Pulgasari!

Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla

Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla is one of my favorite Godzilla movies, period. While this blog was functionally began as an excuse to watch all of them, I have seen this movie several times and enjoy it quite a bit. That's what I know going in. It has been a few years since I last watched, however, so it is entirely possibly something has changed. Especially in the context of a "history of kaiju" movies which prompted me to start this entire project, it will be interesting to see how I continue to feel about this movie (though I expect to enjoy it). 

Jun Fukuda is back in the director's chair, but the one and only person to play Godzilla so far, Haruo Nakajima, finished his tenure as Godzilla in Godzilla vs. Gigan. I did not realize this at the time of watching that movie, so I did not manage to give the legend a proper sendoff. I did, however, enjoy it, and isn't that the hope of every actor on any project? Either way, I respect and appreciate Haruo's legendary work, it will be interesting to see how Godzilla's suit acting evolves as other people take on the role. 

Newcomer Isao Zushi fills the Godzilla role while other newbie (to the series) Kin'ichi Kusumi fills out the titular characters as MechaGodzilla.

If You Haven't Seen it Before

- A priestess predicts/has a vision that a monster is going to attack and destroy a bunch of stuff. Most people write it off, but some take her seriously.

- In a nearby cave, archaeologists discover artifacts regarding a protective monster named King Caesar. An apparent prophecy from the cave also claims that when a black cloud appears in the sky, a giant monster will appear to destroy the world but that two monsters will appear to save the world.

- As the explorers head home, they see a giant, thick black cloud in the sky. Ominous.

- A man attacks and attempts to steal the statue of King Caesar. He is disarmed and defeated, but not without some trouble. He escapes before he can be questioned.

- Godzilla emerges, going on a rampage despite Godzilla having been recently working together with humans in the past several years (since about 1965 according to our records). His roar is terrible, nothing like the classic, good roar.

- Anguirus, Godzilla's friend, appears and fights with him. He gets his jaw split in two for his trouble and nearly dies before escaping. He does manage to do a bit of damage to Godzilla, however, revealing shiny metal underneath his skin. An evolution?

- Of course not! Another Godzilla appears, this one with the correct roar. He fights the 1st Godzilla, who is damaged enough to reveal he's MechaGodzilla, a robot. The ruse discovered, ape like aliens called Simians are revealed to be behind the superweapon MechaGodzilla. 

- MechaGodzilla wins this first battle, Godzilla barely escaping with his life. The robot is damaged as well, however, so all three kaiju seen so far are currently out of commission.

- Contradicting previously established facts about Godzilla, he is empowered after being struck by lightning, healing and ready for another fight.

- The King Caesar statue thief reappears, having another showdown and losing but falling off the boat and taking the statue with him. But this is a trick by the human, having replaced the statue with a fake to throw off his enemies. Clever!

- After a series of adventures and trouble with Simians, the humans manage to find King Caesar's resting place, just in time for the Simians to attack with MechaGodzilla. King Caesar still needs to be woken up, but fortunately there's an Azumi priestess available to sing an unusually long song on the beach.

- The lion/shisa like creature King Caesar finally wakes, battling MechaGodzilla to protect the Earth.

- He loses.

- Godzilla returns for a rematch, turning the tide and allowing he and King Caesar to finally defeat MechaGodzilla.

Kaiju Notes

- A note on Anguirus: he has never won a fight once in his entire life. He's a brave little guy, but he gets his ass kicked almost every time. He has won when part of a team, but once again we watch Anguirus get his ass kicked. The breaking of his jaw seems particularly vicious in this movie because we know he and Godzilla are supposed to get along. Of course it was all just a clever ruse by aliens.

- MechaGodzilla is a fun but simple design. I love a good mecha. He lacks the dedication to the absurd that is Gigan, but makes up for it by at least being intentionally modeled after Godzilla (to explain the simplistic design) and having powerful lasers and missiles.

- King Caesar has a genuinely good design that is wasted by not getting enough screen time. His resting form is intimidating, and while in motion he maintains a little bit of menace even while presented as a heroic figure. His ability to absorb and redirect energy is also a cool concept, and I enjoy his general focus on mobility and skill in a fight. It's ultimately all wasted, however, by his role being dwarfed by Godzilla. It could have been a great opportunity to introduce a heroic monster in the same vein but more explicit than Godzilla, but the G-Man required top billing so no one else can save the day I guess.

- The fights of this film are significantly more believable than some of the other recent ones have been. Godzilla does not waste as much time being a braggart, getting down to business. This may be because he lost or tied his first conflict with MechaGodzilla, though, and needs to team up with King Caesar to even the odds. As an example, when MechaGodzilla has his enemies on one side of him he simply unloads every laser and missile he has at them in an attempt to kill them entirely, rather than any tricks or resorting to hand-to-hand.

- To further the previous point, Godzilla gets a spurting neck wound in the final fight which, for a second, appears to kill him. While he's vulnerable, MechaG throws literal spikes into his body. The violence of this film is maximized on all levels. Bloodier, a bit more realistic, and truly gives you the feeling that these kaiju want to kill each other.

There is a legitimately cool fight between humanoid characters when the aliens are revealed to be ape-like. The human gets his hand cut with a hidden knife, does some slick dodging, and then shoots the alien in the face. The alien doesn't die, but does reveal his true visage. In a genre that is (and should be) focused on monster action, it's not a bad thing to have decent human action as well (so long as it doesn't takeover the focus on monsters). This is an example of such a scene, a good balance to the rest of the story and punctuating all of the humans talk to each other sequences with something fun.

There is a shit ton of murder in this movie. Simians, humans, kaiju, everyone in this thing dies or nearly dies. The humans and aliens are no holds-barred mercing each other while the kaiju are more deadly than usual to each other as well. I'm not sure if it's Fukuda's style or just a unique feature of this script, but we have people being shot in the face, killed by strangulation, thrown in the ocean, stabbing, jaws forcibly split in half, multiple deaths by bullets, multiple spurting neck wounds (one of which ends in death) and (robot) decapitation. Shit's wild, son.

Choosing to make King Caesar mostly useless in the end is hilarious. A full hour of this movie is dedicated to waking up KC so he can save the world, and in the end he gets beat pretty soundly by MechaGodzilla and is barely useful once Godzilla shows up. This is an indication of a weak script, it can't be denied, but it is endlessly funny. At least when we get to watch a full-length song about awakening Mothra, she wakes up and actually accomplishes anything. As usual for this genre, things that absolutely wouldn't work in another movie just somehow manages to not be terrible. It can't be explained, but it can be enjoyed.

At the end of the day, this movie has very little on its mind except violence. Despite this typically negative quality, it is quite simply one of my favorite Godzilla movies. It's awesome. It could be dethroned from my "top 3 kaiju" movie list, to be sure, but I enjoyed it just as much this time as I expected. It is not complex, it is not deep, it's barely competent when you consider King Caesar's central yet pointless role, but it's somehow, nonetheless, fun.

Next: Terror of MechaGodzilla!

Godzilla vs. Megalon

I don't have time, I have a lot going on today! Godzilla vs. Megalon, go! Watch this video if you want information about the movie!

If You Haven't Seen it Before

- A nuclear test sets off a chain reaction, felt as far as Monster Island where Anguirus falls into the fissure that is created. Shortly thereafter, the human inventor Goro and his squad are witness to the emergence of Seatopia when they dry up a lake and make it their base.

- Seatopia attacks, trying to steal the robot that Goro is building called Jet Jaguar. They manage to escape with the robot but have to finish it elsewhere. Unfortunately, the Seatopians track them down and take the robot for themselves.

- Now in possession of Jet Jaguar, the Seatopians reveal their other secret weapon: Megalon, a giant bug-beetle-thing. They attack the surface world, their sworn enemies, using the human-sized Jet Jaguar to guide Megalon to the city.

- Goro uses a failsafe he's built in to gain control of Jet Jaguar again, causing Megalon to lose control and throw a tantrum and take down some military forces. The Seatopians call for help from Space Hunter Nebula M as Jet Jaguar finds Godzilla and gives him a message to come fight Megalon (sadly with no speech bubbles).

- Because Jet Jaguar can fly, he returns to Megalon's position quicker than Godzilla and confronts Megalon (after growing to an appropriate size, having been human sized before). He also grows to regret this, not yet realizing that Gigan has been sent by the Nebulons to support the Seatopian war on earth. JJ finds himself two versus one against Megalon and Gigan (who are fast friends).

- As Jet Jaguar is inevitably outmatched, Godzilla arrives and begins to throw hands. He manages against both foes for some time while Jet Jaguar recovers. Once JJ is up and in action again, the fight vacillates in a few interesting ways before the heroes officially win. Hilariously, Gigan retreats and leaves Megalon to face his fate alone.

- Godzilla bids the humans and Jet Jaguar farewell and heads home. Jet Jaguar and his human handlers lose the film with a Jet Jaguar song and a happy ending, as they too head home.

Kaiju Notes

- Megalon is ridiculous. Your mileage may vary on whether this is a good or bad thing, but I do enjoy the drill hands. He's like the cyborg version of the robotic Gigan.

- Jet Jaguar's design is bad and I don't know why people like it. Always has been. It's not good. In defense of him, it was designed by a literal child, but I don't know why the adults decided to use it in their movie. Of course, it could also have been the best choice they had once "put in a kaiju designed by a child" was the decided course of action.

- Megalon's abilities are drill hands, lasers out of his horn, and some kind of exploding pellet from his mouth. These are not synergistic powers in any way, but they do make him a tough opponent. Megalon is also significantly more mobile than many monsters, being able to shuffle his feet, jump, and move with much more agility than most kaiju. His top speed is apparently achieved by jumping, as an example of his particular mobility (though it looks strange).

- The monster acting is very good. Jet Jaguar manages to emote without any ability to move his face or most of his limbs in any unique manner, and the viciousness of Megalon and Gigan is apparent through their body language, sound effects, and team work. Megalon being as aggressive as Gigan and them getting along because of it is a nice touch as well. Gigan at one point takes Jet Jaguar hostage, which lets the two villains launch attacks at great advantage. 

- Godzilla's acting, on the other hand, doesn't really match the tone. He seems to celebrate himself while (finally) approaching the battle, taking his time to hype himself up rather than being in a hurry to help Jet Jaguar not be destroyed.

- It is known that I enjoy kaiju movies that feature as many monsters as possible, so I liked seeing the whole gang in this one. A lot of people have problems with the Godzilla suit used here, apparently, but I think it's fine.

There are car chases, fist fights, and lots of kaiju action. As far as what we look for in these movies, Godzilla vs. Megalon has it all. The car chase itself is somewhat unique in that there is a lot of "off-road" activity, down steep hills and even staircases, which I don't recall seeing in m/any other films. The chase down the staircase struck me as comedy but I doubt that was the original intent. But with the combination of Jet Jaguar and his human handlers, the weaving of the human story with the kaiju side of things is complete in a way I always appreciate.

For some reason this movie made me think of how incredibly dangerous it must be to be in the Japanese Self Defense Force in this universe. Kaiju attacks are frequent, more than annual affairs, and this is assuming we see all of them as films which probably isn't the case. And many military forces are destroyed in each incident, meaning that signing up for the JSDF is essentially asking to be put directly in the line of fire. I hope they're well compensated. Do you think they're drafted? It hasn't been touched on at all in any of the Godzilla films thus far, and I have many questions.

If the last few films are indicative, I think Godzilla has an ego. He also doesn't kill Megalon or Gigan once he has both down and they're vulnerable, a favor he did not afford some of his early foes. All of this plus his superhero posing before he begins to fight suggests that Godzilla has evolved from his animalistic, straightforward origins to a hero in his own mind who wants to take time to ensure everyone else agrees that he's a bad man. The Apollo Creed to his previous Rocky Balboa. This newfound arrogance of Godzilla is emphasized near the end of the battle when Megalon is helpless and Godzilla decides to dropkick him while Jet Jaguar holds him still. He then proceeds to slam Megalon by the tail into the ground repeatedly, before ultimately allowing Megalon to escape. Earlier Godzilla would never allow his enemy to escape alive, killing Anguirus in Godzilla Raids Again without any hesitation. It's unclear if this is because Godzilla is supposed to be a more heroic figure than in previous films and therefore more merciful, but I am interpreting it as cockiness. He doesn't care if Megalon lives because if he comes back he'll just beat him again. This could be true, but it also means that many more humans will die as kaiju battles always have human casualties and Godzilla seems happy on Monster Island and no longer attacks humans himself. An interesting arc would be for Godzilla's arrogance to come back to bite him, previous (surviving) foes teaming up to take him down once and for all so they could reign supreme. Just from the last two films in the series we've got Gigan, King Ghidorah, and Megalon available.

The relatively new emphasis on the actual monsters motivations and personalities is a welcome change for me, as a lot of previous movies wasted (in my opinion) a lot of time focusing on humanoid characters with the kaiju (the main attraction) being pushed into supporting roles. A balance will always be necessary and it's a difficult one, but Godzilla vs. Megalon manages it relatively deftly. That said, the kaiju are the draw, so I enjoy them being emphasized. Just like good professional wrestling, you don't need words to tell a story about two (or more) forces of nature going at each other. Jet Jaguar is a great example in this film, being less able to emote than any of the other kaiju but also somehow doing the best job of them all. He doesn't react to things with exaggerated movements like most of the monsters and still gets his thoughts across without being able to move his eyes or face in any way. Every suit actor in this movie is working their ass off and it pays off by being entertaining and understandable without any verbal communication or explanations from the human characters. Whether this is due to the direction of Jun Fukuda or the choices of the actors is unclear, but either way I am really into it.

This movie is apparently quite disliked but I'm not sure why. It has some clunkiness to it to be sure, including a car chase that comes off as comedic rather than suspenseful, but ultimately it intertwines the human and kaiju elements well and the kaiju battle is entertaining. Some footage is reused from previous films but even that is done in an understated fashion, being a few seconds here and there. While stock footage usage should be avoided if possible, I'm not going to complain much about a reused shot or two (just as in the previous film when Anguirus clamping on to King Ghidorah was reused from Destroy All Monsters). This film is far from the top of the list for me, not being nearly as ridiculously fun as vs. Gigan or as serious and meaningful as the original Gojira, but ultimately it's an enjoyable light-hearted romp which I have no major complaints about. Like it, don't love it.

Next: Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla!

Godzilla vs. Gigan

Gigan is, no joke, my favorite kaiju. So rather than doing a bunch of setup about how this movie is directed by Jun Fukuda and stars Haruo Nakajima with Kenpachiro Satsuma reprising his role as the titular antagonist, let's get straight to talking about the movie that introduces the best boi Gigan.

If You Haven't Seen it Before

- Hired to make some monster designs for an upcoming theme park called Children's Land, a manga artist sees a woman flee a building as he heads in. She drops a tape which he retrieves, and becomes embroiled in a conspiracy.

- When they play the tape, it sounds like garbled nonsense but we the audience can see the monsters on Monster Island react. They then have a conversation we see through cutesy subtitles and Anguirus goes to "check it out" after Godzilla tells him to.

- Anguirus arrives on land and is viciously attacked by the military. He retreats as the bad guys reveal themselves to the good humans and are also forced to retreat. 

- The bad guys are revealed to be Nebulans, aliens, cockroach-like alients who want to establish "peace" and take over the planet for themselves. They summon King Ghidorah and new monster Gigan to Earth to fight on their behalf using their tapes to control them.

- As Gigan and KG utterly destroy Tokyo while being controlled by the Nebulons, Anguirus returns with Godzilla in tow to bring an end to the assault on humankind.

- Realizing the aliens are controlling Gigan and King Ghidorah, Godzilla turns to attack the Nebulon's lair. It is, of course, equipped with a powerful laser that legitimately injures him (after his other foes have done some damage).

- Near the end of the film, the heroes (human and kaiju alike) are getting their shit absolutely rocked by the combined might of the Nebulons and their minions, but the human plan to blow up the base finally frees Godzilla from the wrath of the laser inside the children's theme park.

- With Gigan and King Ghidorah free from Nebulon control, the monsters have another tornado tag match. Godzilla and Gigan settle things first, with Godzilla scoring a come-from-behind advantage while Anguirus mostly loses his own fight against King Ghidorah.

- The fight ends with Godzilla giving King Ghidorah the Kurt Angle special: first holding him still while Anguirus tackles him (spines-first) and then suplexing him 3 times. For understandable reasons, Gigan and KG decide to run away back into space.

- Our human heroes big adieu to Godzilla and Anguirus as they head back home now that peace on earth has been achieved once more.

Kaiju Notes

- Gigan is perfect. He is the best boi and the only kaiju for which I will always have no notes. His luscious, chicken like form is stunning. His rotating chest blade is amazing. The choice to give him a single giant red eye that is apparently useless is stupendous. The fact that he has no hands and just has hooks instead is genius. Some of this might be hyperbole even though I mean every word, but Gigan legit does have an excellent profile.

- Gigan is especially aggressive compared to most kaiju, who typically (try to) ignore the military around them. But Gigan specifically jumps and reaches for planes to destroy, using his (incredibly dope) hook-hands to knock them out of the sky, even though they clearly can't harm him.

- The fight in Tokyo when the four monsters meet up for the first time is actually one of the more spectacular (literally, a spectacle) events we've seen in any kaiju movie thus far. The monsters fight, but in a reckless manner (as a giant monster might) that destroys almost as much as it saves. Like fighting Hedorah before, it's actually more interesting to me to see the destruction that all kaiju cause all the time, even when they're not trying to destroy a city.

- King Ghidorah does return in this one, and it's nice to see him come back and actually use his Gravity Beams in a fight. He gets his ass kicked every time he decides to use his armless body to physically fight and it makes him look stupid. Not to say a neck could never be used for a successful attack, but it's not typically recommended.

- For the first time ever, Godzilla bleeds. He is cut by Gigan's rotating saw and apparently has normal red-colored blood. Anguirus also gets a truly brutal slice to the face that caused an audible reaction from me. This reflects the above comment that Gigan is pretty brutal; he also uses his hook hands at one point to hit Godzilla in the same spot enough times int he face to cause another gush of blood. Gigan's a beast.

- Anguirus repeats his tactic (and footage) from Destroy All Monsters and latches onto King Ghidorah's neck. It goes exactly as well this time. He does learn to launch himself using his spiny back as a weapon, so he's capable of trying some new tricks.

This now makes a few Fukuda-directed Godzilla movies we've seen so far and I think it's time to confess that I prefer him to Honda. Honda obviously gets credit for originating kaiju fluids and making several great films, but we're 3 into Fukuda's run and I have enjoyed all of them. Even the one most people hate: vs Ebirah. In comparison to Honda, he has a great sense of scale and consequence, as well as embracing the monstrousness of the monsters. It is, as most film related opinions, a matter of taste, but Fukuda seems to know how to hook me in a way that Honda didn't always. I am also cheating a bit by knowing that Fukuda directed one of my absolute favorite Godzilla movies that I've seen so far, so in this paragraph he's getting future credit that we will get to. Another trait of Fukuda's direction that I prefer: much more focus on kaiju fights. I watch these movies primarily to see monsters battle, and Fukuda seems to understand that. While human stories help anchor things, we're here for the monsters.

Monsters talking to each other doesn't happen enough. I love it every time and especially appreciate that the movie doesn't try to give monster conversations pathos. They're silly, let them be silly. You remember the best episode of Pokemon? It was the one where the pokemon talked to each other but still did their stupid "repeat only our names" thing and it was rad. So let's have Anguirus and Godzilla have a chat usint giant speech bubbles while weird sounds come out of their mouths. It won't work in films of every tone, but it did for this especially "out there" film.

Another highlight of this film: it might feature the most thorough destruction of Tokyo (or similarly large city) we have seen in a kaiju movie thus far. Gigan and King Ghidorah wreck it pretty thoroughly before Godzilla and Anguirus arrive, and they manage to contribute to the destruction of Tokyo once they make it to land as well. As I mentioned above, Fukuda (and this script) truly embraces the danger of kaiju. This was also a theme in the previous film in the series, Godzilla vs. Hedorah, which readers may remember as being a big hit for me. 

But! The seriousness of the violence is weighed delicately against the absurdity of both the plot and the "human story." The above plot points is an intensely simplified version, as the plot moves in unusual lurches and jumps in logic. Explaining it as it happens seem impossible through text, so it has to be reduced to its "points" rather than being a chronological telling of the story as it happens. It's entirely reasonable to see this as a weakness of the storytelling, but I personally find it engaging. Multiple times while watching I said, out loud, "this movie is fucking bonkers." And it is. And that's part of why I love it.

In a movie about a manga artist taking down a children's theme park that is also a secret base for a group of cockroach-aliens that have an extremely powerful laser inside the mascot and want to bring peace to Earth through violence and then take it over for themselves, somehow even more absurd things happen as it moves. Seeing a squirming, talking cockroach is simultaneously disgusting and hilarious. I hate looking at cockroaches in any capacity, but watching them call out for their friend under a pile of rubble is amusing nonetheless.

The last note I have is that there does seem to be a message here about the cost of peace. Multiple times peace is implied to be simple to achieve (by the aliens, who are liars) but the latter half of the movie is determined to demonstrate this is not the case: even defending Tokyo from monsters who were destroying it causes a ton of the city to also be destroyed. Perhaps there's something there. The characters reference how complex peace truly is on multiple occasions, first pushing back on the Nebulons insistence that a theme park can bring it about (okay, fair) but later struggling with having the power of Godzilla and Anguirus be the saving grace against the ultra-violence of King Ghidorah and Gigan. It's not settled by the end of the movie, of course, but the humans seem to acknowledge that all of the events (including their own bombing of Children's Land) were necessary to bring some notion of peace back to the world.

Conclusion: I love this movie. Even when it's ridiculous and stupid, it's ridiculous and stupid in a way I enjoy. The monster action is quite good, complex, and lengthy. It's basically everything I want in a silly kaiju movie. Though I do prefer my kaiju movies somewhat more serious-minded to be truly "great," I can still enjoy the hell out of the absurd ones (and often do!).

Next: Godzilla vs. Megalon!

Godzilla vs. Hedorah

Today we're talking smog. Like... a monstrous amount of smog. A smog so monstrous it is itself a monster. It's called Godzilla vs. Hedorah, also known in the US as Godzilla vs. The Smog Monster. Throwing a new director, Yoshimitsu Banno, into the mix, we have Haruo Nakajima predictably returning as the Big G and newcomer to the series Kenpachiro Satsuma playing the titular Hedorah. Satsuma, in particular, will be a major name in the future of this blog (and series) so let's pay attention to him. This is one of the only Godzilla movies thus far to have an incredibly explicit message, most opting to either go for raw entertainment or keep it subtle, and the first in the series to have a strong emphasis on environmentalism.

Godzilla vs. Hedorah is a cult classic and a bit divisive in the "kaiju community," some people enjoying it and others really really not. It should be fun to experience (again) and see what all the hubbub is about. Let's get to it, because this plot synopsis is long!

If You Haven't Seen it Before

- We get an opening theme song, like in a James Bond movie. It's about the monster of pollution and how we need to give the blue sea back. This phrase, "give it all back," which is repeating throughout the song, sounds uncannily like "God is dead" and I absolutely love it.

- A little kid is playing along the beach waiting for his dad to return from scuba diving from the ocean when he sees a pair of malevolent red eyes emerge from the surface and swim toward him. Having been playing with a knife (what?) he points it toward the monster Hedorah as it jumps over his head and leave his unharmed. The blade passes harmlessly through Hedorah in the process, clearly cutting through it but leaving no damage of sign of Hedorah's existence.

- The father is attacked by Hedorah but survives, his story making the news as the world is warned of the danger of the new monster Hedorah. 

- The father has collected some of the sludge that comprises Hedorah, and combines them in a bowl to reveal that they merge into one entity when they meet. Hedorah is essentially born from pollution and can combine to become even larger, explaining the larger one the child and his father saw earlier but also setting it up to be a major (and massive) threat as more sludge pieces merge.

- Hedorah arrives on land and begins to feed on a smokestack (smogstack?). It's interrupted by Godzilla, who initiates a fight between them. One noticeable moment is when Godzilla pierces Hedorah completely with his claws, with Hedorah being seemingly completely unharmed. In the battle, a piece of Hedorah is separated and bursts through the window of a building, killing everyone inside as it covers the room in the toxic sludge that comprises Hedorah's body. This happens in multiple locations before Godzilla manages to drive Hedorah off.

- Hedorah forms completely, becoming a giant flying ball of pollution and death.

- Godzilla and Hedorah reunite for another showdown, Hedorah now larger than Big G and with the ability to transform into a flight mode or a big pissed off smog monster mode.

- After some human focus and an attempt to stop Hedorah, Godzilla comes back strong. He uses his Atomic Breath alongside the human developed electricity weapon to attack Hedorah in two ways simultaneously, quickly and soundly taking the smog monster down. He rips out pieces of Hedorah and begins to destroy them, trying to finish Hedorah off completely.

- In an attempt to live to eat pollution another day, Hedorah transforms into his flight mode and takes off. Godzilla points his Atomic Breath toward the ground and uses it to take flight after Hedorah, tackling and  truly finishing Hedorah off with some judicious throws, grabbing Hedorah, and flying back toward the electricity weapon. Using the weapon again manages to finally kill Hedorah.

- Godzilla glares at the nearby humans, silently warning against our polluting ways before walking away.

- To reemphasize the point, a song about the horrors of pollution plays as Godzilla returns home and the movie ends.

Kaiju Notes

- I think Hedorah's design is very strong. It's simple, but sometimes simple is the answer. Going from tadpole to bigger tadpole to creepy legged creature that feeds on pollution to flying ball of doom is a fun evolution to follow, and more kaiju should change over the course of their introduction. The red eyes are helpfully distinct, giving the relatively shapeless entity something you can focus on. It is also larger than Godzilla, which is rare and contributes to the impression that he's a true threat.

- Hedorah has the ability to shift from giant legged creature to flying jellyfish looking thing, as well as shoot lasers and smog pellets from it's body. It's a strange combination, but effective in a fight. When he thinks he's in danger he just flies away!

- Hedorah's sound is distinct, but also quite horrible. A bit like a warbling whistle, I can't tell if it's supposed to be intimidating, annoying, alien, or some combination thereof.

- Godzilla behaves a bit more humanlike overall here, seeming to duck, weave, and even taunt like a boxer might. He even launches a sneak attack at one point after causing a distraction. All of this also means that he wastes too much time preparing to fight instead of actually fighting, costing some people their lives.

- In contrast, Hedorah seems to be a being of pure rage. It kills anything and everyone in its path without any hesitation, costing lives every time Godzilla wastes time. It also seems immune to Godzilla's Atomic Breath and very difficult to harm with any type of conventional weapon, making it a threat that has not yet really been realized in one of these films.

- At one point, Hedorah knocks Godzilla out temporarily, picks him up (in flight mode), and throws him down a mountain before trying to drown him in a shallow grave using his sludge. It's a good and remarkably brutal strategy.

- Godzilla using his Atomic Breath to fly after and tackle Hedorah is prime kaiju movie nonsense. I know a lot of people hate it but they're wrong.

First thing, on the direction and story: this movie is dark as shit. People covered in Hedorah's smog are literally reduced to bones, and one man jumps off of the frame of a skyscraper to escape the incoming Hedorah, so we get to watch a silhouette jump from a building. Hedorah passes through the frame, the steel passing through it's body, but melts the steel behind it. It's just one part of an overall morbid film, but left a strong impression. At one point a compilation of scenes shows a literal baby stuck inside (apparently harmless) sludge, unable to escape. Quite honestly it's all just a bit fucked up. Combined with the incredible difficulty everyone has even harming Hedorah and the message seems pretty clear: stopping the threat of Hedorah is something you might have one chance at. On that point:

Godzilla vs. Hedorah pulls no punches in making it clear that it is a warning against pollution. Hedorah is a collection of pollution that is nearly unstoppable, and there are at least 3 different songs about how the earth is being destroyed by our human nonsense. With even the savior of the film being unable to stop the collection of pollution without aid from the humans (and vice versa), the sentiment is very clear: if we have any chance of stopping the earth from being destroyed, we're going to have to work together. Clearly, this did not take and we've clearly learned nothing in the 50 years since the film's release.

Another thing to note is that the humans in this movie are completely bumbling. While the electricity weapon they develop is actually effective against Hedorah, they manage to fuck it up every time they try to use it, leaving it to Godzilla to activate it with his Atomic Breath. While it would have worked had they managed to actually use it, Godzilla ultimately saves the day by being smarter than the military. Good thing he was on their side this one time.

Ultimately, I am on the side of "yes." This movie is good, if not great. Hedorah is an effective and scary villain, the constant focus on the damage done in kaiju battles (including death and injury tolls after each encounter either with Hedorah alone or when he fights Godzilla) makes the world feel more real, and the morbid elements actually make the threat of Hedorah more haunting. Rarely do we actually learn a number of people who were harmed or killed when kaiju are running around, and it sanitizes the carnage of what we are supposes to be feeling. Although Godzilla is the hero of this film, knowing he had a hand in the deaths of hundreds (even if saving thousands) makes the reality of the situation clear in a way that's rarely done in these movies and I wish there were more of. The wild and campy ending, where Godzilla uses his primary weapon to fly after Hedorah, is brilliant and ridiculous in a way that can't be justified: you either like it or don't. I like it, even if I acknowledge that it sucks. It does suffer from being almost entirely unnecessary in the context, as Godzilla had really already won the battle and finished off Hedorah, but they added the extra scene for no clear reason. Still, if the biggest flaw of this movie is that Godzilla does something silly, I'd say that's a win (and that you are watching a movie about a sentient monster made of pollution). Recommend!

Next: Godzilla vs. Gigan!

All Monsters Attack

Yo, Ishirō Honda is back with a movie about Godzilla! Kinda. It's mostly about Minilla and a little kid. But Haruo Nakajima is, of course, back as Godzilla for the few minutes of original monster footage they shot for this movie. Let's just get to it.

 

If You Haven't Seen it Before

- The opening credits are new, showing monsters doing monster stuff before staff are named. It's fun.

- Children walk down the street singing a song about baby Godzilla, Minilla, before being attacked by a bully named Gabara.

- The main character is a little boy named Ichiro who dreams of going to Monster Island. He spends a lot of time alone as his parents work a lot.

- He grabs a toy from his closet and day dreams about going to Monster Island and watching Godzilla fight Kamacuras and Ebirah in reused footage from Son of Godzilla.

- He falls down a hole and meets Minilla, who literally talks to him about the giant monster Gabara, who is bullying Minilla. Godzilla won't take down Gabara for his son because he thinks Minilla needs to learn to fight his own battles.

- We now rewatch one of the battles between Godzilla and Ebirah, as well as G vs giant monster Kumonga.

- After the stock footage finally, mercifully, ends, Minilla is attacked by Gabara again. Before we get the conclusion of this, Ichiro is grabbed by a legitimately surprising man covered in leaves in the forest.

- Back in the real world, Ichiro has been kidnapped by villains because of a convoluted and stupid reason.

- Stuff happens, and we're back on Monster Island where Gabara and Minilla fight.

- Minilla finally outwits Gabara, and Godzilla comes by to congratulate his child before being ambushed by an angry Gabara.

- He soundly destroys Gabara, throwing him right on his head and neck. Gabara is lucky he doesn't break in half. He runs away.

- Back in the real world, Ichiro uses the lessons he imagined to thwart his own attacks and stand up to his own bully: little boy Gabara.

- Fin.

 

Kaiju Notes

- Gabara sucks.

- I do like Gabara's electric hands powers.

- Gabara also fights like a bully, which is kind of fun. At one point he literally places a hand on Minilla's hand while Minilla helplessly swings and that's pretty cute.

 

Overall, this movie blows. I knew going in that this is generally considered one of if not the worst Godzilla movie, but goddamn was I not prepared. This movie actually actively sucks. It does have a message, which I typically enjoy in my kaiju flicks, but it's surrounded by weird, horrible nonsense. All of the monster battles are the literal figment of a child's imagination, and rather than that being a great excuse to do wild shit you might see in the dreamworld of a kaiju fanatic that is also 9 years old, you get stock footage showing battles we saw several movies ago with about 10 minutes of unique monster action. It's... disappointing, to say the least. When I was a child, my dreams about monster fights would've included alongside Godzilla riding a laser-shark into battle against King Ghidorah, each head holding a sword (all different types, of course) and them having a battle on the surface of Venus, complete with acid volcanoes and traveling lightning storms. But apparently little Ichiro is not the creative type so we get Ebirah and Godzilla playing rock volleyball again. I thought that scene was ridiculous but amusing the first time, I hate it this go round.

The message isn't necessarily a bad one. Ichiro did need a confidence boost and the incredibly annoying Minilla did give him the (fantasy) inspiration he needed to stand up to his own Gabara, but just because a movie might be good for a small and impressionable child does not make it amusing, enjoyable, or good. Skip it unless you're showing it to the children in your lives and also hate them.

Next: Godzilla vs. Hedorah!