Colossal

Kaiju movies can be funny. Death Kappa tried it, Shin Godzilla had some undeniable intentional comedic themes, and now we have Colossal. A dark comedy directed by Nacho Vigalondo, Colossal is a "lite-kaiju" movie for reasons you'll understand as you read on. The stars of this one are not really kaiju actors (especially not in suits), but instead the very famous Anne Hathaway and Jason Sudeikis. Originally billing itself as "the cheapest Godzilla movie ever made" when it was shown at the Cannes Film Festival, Colossal is a story about a lot of things: the kaiju being more metaphor than character in a manner we have not ever seen in any movie we've covered yet.

This film does have some interesting drama behind the scenes... That promo line, "the cheapest Godzilla movie ever made," alongside using some unauthorized images of Godzilla to bring in potential investors actually got the film in a bit of trouble. Toho, the copyright owners/creators of Godzilla, did not take kindly to the producers using Godzilla to finance their upcoming film and filed a lawsuit before the film even began filming. The resutling settlement that took place before the movie was widely released which caused the film's setting (for the kaiju elements) to move from Tokyo to Seoul and a promise that no Godzilla derivatives would appear. The greatest irony of all? Colossal had a budget of $15 million dollars, which is tiny for an American studio release but obviously quite a bit to most people. The original Gojira had a budget of 100 million yen, the equivalent of about $3 million today. Even Shin Godzilla, released the same year as Colossal's film festival premiere, had a budget equivalent to $15 million, making the fact that Colossal got in trouble for using Godzilla's image in its early stages and the "cheapest" tagline completely unnecessary because it wasn't even true! Hilarious. That all said, let's talk about this dark comedy.

If You Haven't Seen it Before

- In Seoul, South Korea, we see a giant monster appear. 25 years later, we meet Gloria as she comes home after yet another night drinking. Her boyfriend breaks up with her and packs her things, so Gloria has little choice but to return to her hometown alone.

- Once back in town she coincidentally comes across old acquaintance Oscar. He owns a bar (perfect!) and offers her a job.

- Oscar shows signs of who he really is right away when Gloria almost smooches one of his friends and Oscar reacts very strongly but frames it as concern for her sake.

- Waking up to the news of a giant monster randomly materializing in Seoul, stomping through the city, and then simply disappearing into thin air, Gloria is shocked. She drinks to cope, predictably.

- Waking up to Oscar showing up at her house to offer her a TV they apparently discussed last night but that she doesn't remember, there's been another monster attack. 

- This attack being less severe with the monster mostly standing around looking confused, Gloria notices that the creature shares a particular gesture with her. It seems crazy, but maybe they're connected?

- Gloria conducts a test that confirms she is in fact the monster. While hanging with her drinking buddies (including Oscar) she drunkenly reveals her new secret.

- After accidentally crashing a helicopter into her head (in her defense, it did shoot her first) Gloria gets overwhelmed and ends up falling down. She wakes up panicked to find out how many people she killed when she crashed, but this news comes secondary to the reveal that when Oscar enters the park he also emerges in Seoul as a giant robot.

- Gloria decides to make an attempt at amends by having someone translate some Korean characters and writes an apology in the ground at her next opportunity. She stops drinking, trying to be better given everything.

- Gloria makes a move on the cute guy in her friend group and wakes up in the morning with him to find that the Oscar-Robot is taunting Seoul with threats of destruction. She confronts him in the playground and even slaps him in the face to the cheers of everyone who thinks it's just two monsters fighting.

- Oscar begins to finally act out more obviously, using his power over Gloria as her boss and a threat to the people of Seoul to control her, constantly vacillating between apologetic/kind and abusive.

- During one of Oscar's episodes, Gloria remembers the incident that caused the kaiju connection, when they were hit by lightning inside the playground while carrying toys that look like their respective creatures. She realizes he's always been this way and confronts him just as the air raid warnings go off indicating the time to destroy or save Seoul is nearly upon us.

- The two have a fight in Gloria's house where she breaks all of her furniture trying to stop him, but he escapes and heads toward the park. They square up to fight in the park, but Oscar is bigger and stronger than her so takes her down easily. While she tries to get up, Oscar intentionally steps on several buildings while she begs him to stop.

- Saying he will do this every morning if she leaves, Gloria seems despondent until she comes up with a plan for the next morning. She flies to Seoul.

- When the air raid sirens go off, both parties prepare to confront the other. Gloria uses her human body in Seoul to manifest her monster body in the park, now able to handle Oscar quite easily since now she's bigger and stronger. She throws him into the horizon, finally bringing an end to his robotic reign of terror.

Kaiju Notes 

- Monster-Gloria is a pretty generic looking beast, resembling a goblin as much as it does any animal or human. Considering it's now really the point of the movie, it's difficult to really fault it for not being a complex design. It does have a relatively scary countenance, but it shows a degree of expressiveness that really helps Gloria's thoughts and intentions come across.

- Robot-Oscar is a little more intentionally designed, having a square head and a singular red eye surrounded by little robot horns. The singular red eye (and perhaps automaton-ness) help make it seem a bit menacing.

If it's not entirely obvious, and it should be, this is a metaphor about abusive relationships. Gloria really just goes from one to another, as her boyfriend in the beginning of the movie is clearly fed up with her alcoholism and antics but displays that same "fed-up-ness" even when she's in recovery and in a better position. Oscar, of course, isn't her boyfriend (and could only barely be called a friend by the time he starts acting out) but is the most obvious case of the abusive men Gloria has to deal with. Oscar is an abusive relationship that's primarily empowered by the kaiju connection he and Gloria share with the people of Seoul as his pawns. And it's not just Gloria caught in his tangled web of abuse, as his friends seem unable to do anything against him when either he acts out or turns against them directly.

Joel, the cute guy Gloria starts a little fling with, is the worst. He knows how Oscar behaves and the consequences of it and leaves Gloria to do all of the work in trying to prevent it. I have to assume there's some sort of reason behind why he does nothing and watches Gloria get beat up instead of just punching his so-called friend Oscar in the dick, but it definitely makes me hate him. He does watch happily the television when Gloria confronts him from Seoul, but he was the person most able to actually do something about the situation and it just infuriates me that he didn't.

Both of the lead actors are great. Gloria's growing confidence and subtle recovery comes across quite well, and Sudeikis is quite good at unpeeling the onion of Oscar's rage as we go, first seeming fairly normal before becoming more and more noticeably unhinged. Anne Hathaway in particular is putting in a lot of work by focusing her performance on her body language and expressions, not getting the chance to make the same monologues as Sudeikis but manages to show Gloria's raveling at the same time as Oscar's unraveling.

Colossal is not a complex film. Even this review (is that what I do here? Reviews?) is relatively short because there aren't GIANT COMPLEX IDEAS to be explored. Abusive relationships, metaphor, kaiju, go. Great performances. But Colossal doesn't need to be complicated: it's great. Do yourself a favor and check it out.

Next: Godzilla Trilogy (Netflix)!

D-War

The same man who made the Yonggary film from 1999 is back for another shot at a kaiju movie: Shim Hyung-rae returns! While Yonggary did not go over well on this blog, we believe in 2nd (or 3rd or 4th or 75th) chances in this house! Like Yonggary, D-War is based in the US and stars mostly American (or at least English-speaking) actors. The most recognizable of these actors are Jason Behr and Robert Forster, but there's some other familiar faces in here too.

The monsters/kaiju in this one are almost entirely CGI, so there's no suit credit to be given. But it is notable that this film pulls from Korean mythology, with the premise being a dragon-like serpent called an Imugi transforming through mystical means into a proper Dragon. The movie spells this Imoogi, so that's what we're going with here. Another significant note for this film is that at the time it was released it was the most expensive Korean film ever made. So, hopefully that investment pays off when it comes to quality!

If You Haven't Seen it Before

- Every 500 years, a woman is born who contains a mighty spirit. Pursued by both good and evil serpents/Imoogi because of her power to turn them into powerful dragons, our main character Ethan is sworn to protect this woman.

- We get the story of the last woman born with this power, and see a tragic love story from 500 years ago where the woman and her protector/lover die after escaping from the evil serpent/Imoogi Baraki.

- Ethan, the reincarnation of the warrior who died with the previous Spirit lady, finds her reincarnation, a woman named Sarah.

- Tasked to bring Sarah to the Grand Cave on her 20th birthday, bad things begin to happen as the evil Baraki arrives in Los Angeles, and some mysterious and clearly evil human figure confronts Ethan (seems like a wizard or something).

- Escaping with Sarah and his friend, they are pursued by wizard guy but hit him with a car. He manifests armor and beats them up, but another car manages to knock him over and allow them to escape.

- Baraki's army rises to give chase, and now LA is under attack by the army in pursuit of Sarah (and Ethan).

- Not managing to make it out of LA before Baraki's army descends upon everyone, Baraki appears to be winning. Just in the nick of time, the military counter attacks and manages to fend Baraki off for a moment.

- We now get to watch Baraki's reptilian army battle the US military, and... it's kind of fun?

- Eventually, Baraki captures Ethan and Sarah and takes them to a ritual site. Once there, the good Imoogi emerges and tries to protect them, but is quickly felled by the powerful Baraki.

- Sarah realizes what she must do, and feeds her spiritual orb to the good Imoogi. She collapses and it transforms into a powerful dragon (even grows arms)!

- After another extremely quick battle, the good Dragon shoots a fireball down the throat of Baraki, who is reduced first to a skeleton and then to ash.

- Sarah is dead, but her spirit lingers long enough to tell Ethan she will love him for eternity.

Kaiju Notes 

- The Imoogi are giant snakes. They look like snakes and they act like snakes. Buraki is darker, so he looks more evil.

- The Atrox army also contains giant artillery bearing Dawdlers, the agile flying Bulco, and velociraptor/utahraptor like Shaconnes.

- Lastly, the Celestial Dragon is a very classic asian dragon creature.

- None of these kaiju designs are particularly creative, if you can't tell.

So, this is a very strange case. D-War is... horrible. And I love it. It starts out cheesy and weird and just doubles down over and over and over until a giant reptilian army is fighting with the US military. This movie has a distinct sense of humor but ultimately plays it straight, and I think its better for it. Despite how nonsensical every event is, the commitment to the bit makes it work despite never being anything resembling a quality film. It's a hard case, and it won't work for everyone. I waffle on whether I enjoy it myself. But at the end of the day for me it lands on the "so bad it's kinda good" side of things in that indiscernible way only movies of this kind.

Beyond that, there's very little that can be said about D-War. It sucks, but in a way that somehow makes it work? I could never possibly recommend it as an even "okay" movie, but find it entertaining. Whether it's giant dinosaurs launching artillery or dragons whipping US military helicopters out of the sky, this movie is just strange, terrible, and entertaining all at the same time. The acting isn't particularly good and the jokes are generally pretty bad but this shit makes me laugh every time. I have no way to explain it, so I'm not going to try. If you're into awful movies that somehow make it work, this is an example (unlike Death Kappa, which just sucks).

Next: Gamera the Brave!

Yonggary (Reptilian)

Yonggarry is a remake of a 1967 movie named Yongary, Monster from the Deep, directed by Shim Hyung-rae. Interestingly, despite being a Korean produced movie by Korean creators, the cast is primarily western actors and the movie seems to have been filmed in English and take place in a western country (probably the US). I'm not an expert on Korean cinema by any means so I have no idea if this is particularly significant, but definitely seemed worth noting. Like the previous film we covered, the titular monster does not have a (credited) suit actor, being a full CGI creation. Though suits were used in the production of the film, there's no trace of this in the final product. While I'm sure there was an actor inside said suit, I haven't been able to find their name.

The only really interesting background fact of this movie is why we're covering the 1999 remake instead of the 1967 classic and it's simple: the original is a lost film. While a short cut/version has been found in the years since it was initially thought lost to time, it's still not the complete film. Rather than do that film a disservice in speaking on an incomplete cut of it, I decided to watch the remake instead so I could get a full Yonggary experience. Hopefully it pays off.

If You Haven't Seen it Before

- A group of archaeologists are exploring a cave. Coming across some creepy shit, they get exploded and a bunch of people die.

- A photojournalist, Bud, goes to the dig site and meets one of the only survivors from the previous party and the new leader, Campbell, as well as his assistant Holly. The giant bones they are uncovering is said to be "the most important discovery in human history."

- Mysterious incidents begin to happen to the camp, with men from the dig site dying in "accidents" which are very clearly not accidents. Campbell doesn't care at all, simply telling the workers to dispose of the body and continue working, at one point threatening to turn them in for being undocumented.

- The former leader of the archaeologists, Hughes, appears again, warning of a horrible fate to befall the Earth if the dig continues. He is ignored and taken away by the workers but inspires Holly to quit.

- When the bones are finally unearthed, they are revived by an alien spaceship which has been established to exist in the movie already. The creature, giant and angry, kills many of the workers, including Campbell.

- As Yonggary, the giant monster, is snatched away by the aliens, Hughes and Holly are taken into military custody. They are eventually confronted by Yonggary again. A helicopter squadron attacks it but is predictably destroyed, but gives Holly and Hughes enough time to escape.

- A showdown between the military and Yonggary ensues, revealing that Yonggary is a weapon for the aliens to weaken Earth and allow them conquest.

- Hughes and Holly eventually figure out that Yonggary is being controlled by the aliens using a node in its forehead.

- The node destroyed, Yonggary becomes a bit of a hero, trying to help people rather than harm them.

- The aliens, as predicted by H&H, send another monster (Cykor) to destroy Yonggary.

- Cykor is eventually destroyed by Yonggary after initially getting the upper hand, and Yonggary is safely transported to a remote island where it can live peacefully.

Kaiju Notes

- Yonggary looks... terrible. Not just due to the bad CGI, though it is quite bad, but also because it's just a very generic design for a very generic monster. It's vaguely reptilian but lacks any real defining features or weight. Pretty disappointing for the star of your monster movie.

- Cykor is actually better than Yonggary, being some sort of chimera which is at least interesting if still 90s-CGI-ugly. Though it lacks a face, it at least has a distinct shape and purpose: a weapon. With wrapping tentacles, many claws, at least four legs, and a thick tail that can be used for leverage, this is the only creature that adds some character to a movie that otherwise lacks any.

- Cykor also gets up after being fully decapitated by Yonggary. It raises the question of why the aliens waited for Yonggary to be revived. While the titular Y-man did eventually win the fight, Cykor seems plenty able to wipe out all militaries all by its lonesome. The aliens would have plenty of time to dig up Yonggary themselves and then have 2 monsters under their control.

This movie absolutely sucks.

Next: Godzilla 2000!

Pulgasari

zLet's get out of Japan for the first time in a long time! We're talking about Pulgasari, a North Korean kaiju film from 1984. That might strike you as strange, but let's continue. The background on this film is... a lot. The director, Shin Sang-ok, was a famous and popular director from South Korea who was kidnapped by North Korean agents in the 70's in an attempt to elevate North Korean cinema. Pulgasari was the last of these films made by Shin, and a remake of a lost film from the 60's based on the same legend. There's not space enough here to talk about the kidnapping saga, but needless to say the making of this film is predicated on some absolutely buck-wild events.

The wackiness of the background of this film doesn't end there, however, as the main actor of Pulgasari, the titular character? Kenpachiro Satsuma, a veteran of Godzilla movies and the suit actor for Godzilla himself in the upcoming Heisei era of Godzilla films. In fact, the first of the Heisei Godzilla movies came out before Pulgasari, so Satsumsa went from being cast as Godzilla, to making a North Korean kaiju film with a director who was kidnapped by the state, to playing Godzilla in subsequent films. That's not as wild as literally being nabbed by a country to elevate their country's cinema, but it is a strange turn of events all its own that seemed worth mentioning.

If You Haven't Seen it Before

- In a small village ruled by a horrible tyrant, a local blacksmith tries to keep the army from taking his village's farming and cooking tools, without which they'll be unable to live (literally). He is imprisoned. 

- Before he dies of starvation, he creates a figure and prays to the gods that they will make the figure a living creature that protects people and saves humanity.

- The adorable Pulgasari predictably comes to life and begins to eat all things metal his tiny self can get ahold of.

- As the tyrants soldiers come by to further torment the villagers, the ever-growing Pulgasari begins to eat their weapons and bite their faces, finally beginning a proper resistance. Pulgasari is now human-sized, having begun his life just a few days before while fitting in the palm of a hand.

- The newly inspired rebels, supported by Pulgasari, invade the local tyrants' palace and kill him.

- The king, of whom the corrupt and terribly tyrant was but a representative, must crush this new rebellion. Unfortunately for him, Pulgasari keeps growing stronger and bigger as they bring weapons for him to eat.

- The king does manage to capture and execute the leader of the rebellion, and threatens to kill the blacksmith's daughter (with whom Pulgasari has a bond) if Pulgasari does not surrender himself.

- Sacrificing himself for his greatest friend, Pulgasari subjects itself to fire and explosives as the king's men try to kill him. This fails and they reap some heavy consequences by dying in a brutal fashion.

- The evil army apparently, finally, manages to kill Pulgasari by setting a trap and burying him alive. The evil army begins to win this war, executing the leader of the rebellion and having already captured the blacksmith's daughter.

- The blacksmith's daughter escapes and is out for vengeance! She revives Pulgasari using her blood and he returns to finally finish off the evil king.

- After smiting the king, Pulgasari is regarded as a hero by his people and they allow him to eat their weapons (as they no longer need them).

- Insatiable, Pulgasari continues eating, eventually progressing to their cooking and farming tools just like the original tyrant that started this all. 

- The blacksmith's daughter, Pulgasari's best friend, realizes he cannot control himself and will lead to the death of them all when he eats all of their metal tools.

- She hides herself in a giant metal bell, ringing it to draw the attention of Pulgasari. As he prepares to eat the bell with her inside, she prays that he will leave this earth with her.

- Having eaten the person who gave him life, Pulgasari turns to stone before shattering.

Kaiju Notes

- Both baby and teen Pulgasari are adorable. Resembling an armadillo mixed with a bipedal lizard, he is almost a perfect union of the cute/scary scale while he's maturing.

- As Pulgasari grows, he gains horns to complement his appearance. Some might claim that looks like a demon, and they'd be right, but at least he looks like a (relatively) friendly one.

- Pulgasari's motivation, eating metal, is strange. He wouldn't make much of a kaiju in the Godzilla-verse since he lacks lasers or explosive weaponry, but in the context of helping people rebel against tyrants it's a very good fit. Though this story takes place many centuries ago, I bet a metal eating monster which appears invulnerable to most harm would fuck up some tanks and battleships too, if he wanted.

- Pulgasari does seem to be able to absorb heat and use it as a weapon, so that might actually be really useful if he were up against Godzilla. Radiation is a type of heat, right? In this movie though he uses it in one dramatic scene to absolutely fuck up some soldiers. After being set on fire and being hot, he goes to cool off in the sea. The soldiers trying to escape from him via boat are capsized and thrown in the water, and the water begins to boil as Pulgasari cools off. Holy shit.

- Satsuma brings his veteran suit acting ability to Pulgasari, making the little and big versions seem like a loyal pet to the blacksmith's daughter, who simply can't be killed and loves eating metal.

Pulgasari is not going to be gaining any points for excellent special effects or story telling. It does, however, do an effective job at telling the story it is going for. Pulgasari himself manages to look more menacing than he behaves (unless you're his enemy), which is fitting for his ultimate characterization of a relatively simple beast with an interest in helping his friends and eating metal. This simpleness contributes to his downfall, however, as he takes all the villagers metal not out of malice but out of his own desires. The human performances are broad, but Satsuma's work as Pulgasari is particularly interesting. 

As mentioned a few sentences before, Pulgasari seems more "simple-minded animal" than anything else. Even at his most menacing it often seems accidental, as in the above mentioned scene where he boils soldiers in the sea. Pulgasari himself didn't seem to have it as a plan, simply killing all of these people as a consequence of trying to cool himself down. It's brutal in effect, but seemingly innocent in intent, and it creates an interesting dynamic between Pulgasari's effect and his affect. While obviously Satsuma did not (likely) make these decisions by himself and it was likely in the script, it colors everything Pulgasari does and makes the creature himself enjoyable to watch. Even his death is a bit unclear, in that his (accidental) eating of the blacksmith's daughter either makes him choose to die or happens as a consequence of him killing the one who gave him life. Either way, the circumstances only happen because the blacksmith's daughter understands that he'll simply eat metal when he sees it, so it contributes to an interpretation of him as simple rather than malicious, or even particularly intentional in his actions.

Some have suggested that Pulgasari's arc is a critique of North Korean leadership, being a revolutionary figure who saves the people before turning to being their oppressor in a similar vein of the previous despot. While I can understand that take on a "this is what happens on paper" level, it doesn't read to me as true based on the actual film. While it's all technically true, Pulgasari's characterization (see the paragraphs above) makes it seem more accidental than intentional despotism, which is not applicable to the government of North Korea. Each choice they make is intentional and has a reason behind it far beyond Pulgasari's simple desires, so I think applying that interpretation to the movie would actually weaken it as critique of the government who kidnapped the director. Pulgasari has more in common with Daiei's Daimajin, both centered on heroic (and violent) creatures which must be brought down by the same people they helped. Adding to this that the plot is apparently based on a Korean legend, Pulgasari seems a more straight-forward kaiju film rather than a thinly-veiled takedown of Kim Jong-il.

At the end of the day, Pulgasari is more interesting than it is entertaining. It's not necessarily bad in any way, but there's nothing about it that makes a strong initial impression. In the context of kaiju movies it is very similar to Daimajin, though substituting "hunger" for "wrath" as the titular character's motivation. Pulgasari himself is a bit of a delight as a character, being somehow vacant and self-directed at the same time and charming yet menacing. It's hard to suggest one watches this for themselves, but it's also not the worst film we've seen through this blog by any means. If you're really into kaiju movies (what a weirdo, who does that?), it's worth a look-see.

Next: The Return of Godzilla!